GUSWORLD
Rant Of The Day THIS RANT 20/08/96

Rant Of The Day is where I get to mouth off about whatever I feel like for however long I like. Theoretically, I'll update my whinge/opinion piece every weekday; in practice, maybe not so often.

Porn films that should and shouldn't be made

For reasons to do with my real job, I've been spending more time than is strictly necessary hanging around sex sites on the Internet. One thing this has achieved is to give me an uncomfortable familiarity with the titling conventions of porn flicks. I therefore feel a sickening degree of confidence in proposing the following pair of lists, detailing both good and bad titles for potential skin flicks of the future:

GOOD TITLE FOR A PORN FLICK BAD TITLE FOR A PORN FLICK
Deep Inside Pamela Anderson Deep Inside Amanda Vanstone
Begging For It Not At All Interested
Teenage Mattress Twin Beds For Granny
Rampacious Young Vixens Bored Actresses Fake Orgasm
David Duchovny's Bedroom Tips Bruce Ruxton's Bedroom Tips
All Night Long 60 Seconds Of Fumbling
Fun With Leather Fun With Toenail Clippings
Topless Temptation Toothless Temptation
Tanned Blond Tennis Instructor Hairy Backed Tax Inspector


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