GUSWORLD
BILL BORED

Media Release

Bill Gates would have gotten away with it if it wasn't for those pesky kids

CEO's surprise testimony in the DOJ trial.

Sydney, 27th November, 1998 -- Bill Gates, chairman and CEO of Microsoft, announced yesterday that he would have gotten away with it if it wasn't for those pesky kids.

"I would have gotten away with it if it weren't for those meddling kids," he said in response to accusations that Microsoft had unfairly used its power in the operating system market to leverage the growth of Internet Explorer.

Gates admitted that he had dressed up as a scary ghost, a mummy, Frankenstein and a kindly woman called Mrs. Gossamer in an attempt to deter DOJ investigators from determining the true nature of the charges against the company.

"I slipped up by getting that spooky glow in the dark paint on my shoes," admitted the increasingly barmy CEO.

"I'm not Shaggy and this is not Scooby Doo," responded Judge Thomas Jackson who is presiding over the trial.

####

Microsoft, Windows, the word 'fuck', modern dance, Jennifer Aniston, NBC, Java, the planet Earth, Velma, Trans Am, Belgium, the name "Reg Dwight", Justice, DVD and Windows NT are either registered trademarks or trademarks of Microsoft Corp. in the United States and/or other countries. Other product and company names herein may be trademarks of their respective owners.

Note to editors: If you are interested in viewing additional information on Microsoft, please visit the Microsoft Web page at http://www.microsoft.com/hauntedhouse.htm on Microsoft's corporate information pages.

For further information contact:

Hanna Barbera.


MAILClick here to contact Gus

OOPS! Go back up a level

GUSWORLDReturn to Gusworld Central